The past two months have been quit a journey. Leaving all you know, leaping into the unknown is scary. This is exactly what God told me to do though. To respond to His call, His love and trust Him.
In the midst of moving across the country, adjusting to a new job, trying to make friends, planning a wedding, and traveling with the mobile team I have been s t r e t c h e d more than I could have ever anticipated. I don't think I could ever convey how hard it's been. Honestly I feel like I never know what's going on. Most of the plans I make fall through, get changed or pumped and new tasks are always appearing. Flexibility has definitely been key and when I forget that it makes life miserable.
I knew and was warned be those close to me of how hard it was going to be and still I am shocked. It's surprising how we can know something like that before hand and yet still be surprised. I remember thinking at the end of my fourth week here in Salem, 'This week was kinda good', for the first time since moving. Not that I hadn't had good days, but the strain of learning a new place yet desiring only to be back on the east coast took everything out of me. I've had some really hard and straining days since that week, but overall things have gotten better and easier, which is a result of making the decision to actually live here, not back in Greenville or Orlando (you know in my mind, hopes, and dreams).
Allowing God to mold me as He wants is painful, but it is definitely better than going half way and then resisting the change (which is what I was doing the first three weeks and still sometimes realize I'm doing), it is a hourly decision I have to make. If He sees it as best for me, than it is!
"I will lean
I'll give in
I will yield to Your draw"
In the midst of moving across the country, adjusting to a new job, trying to make friends, planning a wedding, and traveling with the mobile team I have been s t r e t c h e d more than I could have ever anticipated. I don't think I could ever convey how hard it's been. Honestly I feel like I never know what's going on. Most of the plans I make fall through, get changed or pumped and new tasks are always appearing. Flexibility has definitely been key and when I forget that it makes life miserable.
I knew and was warned be those close to me of how hard it was going to be and still I am shocked. It's surprising how we can know something like that before hand and yet still be surprised. I remember thinking at the end of my fourth week here in Salem, 'This week was kinda good', for the first time since moving. Not that I hadn't had good days, but the strain of learning a new place yet desiring only to be back on the east coast took everything out of me. I've had some really hard and straining days since that week, but overall things have gotten better and easier, which is a result of making the decision to actually live here, not back in Greenville or Orlando (you know in my mind, hopes, and dreams).
"God understands our limits; He also knows how close to our limit
He needs to put us in order for us to grow."
He needs to put us in order for us to grow."
Mike told me this one day when I felt like I was beyond my limit, broken and homesick. It has stuck with me since. I know that God is good. I know that God loves me. He knows me more than I know myself. I know that He wants the best for me. And I know that He has called me to live here in Salem for this time.
That is what I hold onto.Allowing God to mold me as He wants is painful, but it is definitely better than going half way and then resisting the change (which is what I was doing the first three weeks and still sometimes realize I'm doing), it is a hourly decision I have to make. If He sees it as best for me, than it is!
"This love will not leave you the same
This love is calling your name
Calling you to leap over mountains, into the unknown
Trust Me!
For I want you where I am
So I won't leave you as you are"
- IHOP Prayer Room web-stream, Worship with the Word
1 comment:
Rebekah! You are such an incredible person and I am so grateful for all you're doing for the Lord. Your servant's heart is so lovely.
You are missed dearly. But we are all so please with your life of ministry... as is our Father!
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